Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Baby Watch -- Week 28

One word about this week -- HORMONES!

My mood is really starting to be affected and I can't stand it. It is as if I am permanently experiencing the worst PMS ever. One second I am fight back tears, the next I am madder than a hornet! And my brain is constantly saying, "Stop! Don't act like that!" But, I can't stop. I spew from the mouth horrible things, I shed the tears over silly things. I can't stand it.

Yesterday morning started off poorly. Hoss is fighting a cold, which has spread to a cough and is mostly in his chest. He isn't running a fever and appears okay, but he is having trouble sleeping. He had nightmares the night prior and did not get a good night's sleep, so he definitely was not ready to get out of bed when it was time which put us behind and put me in a horrible mood as I was barking orders to everyone in the house to hurry up.

Hoss also had a small performance at his daycare yesterday in which he had to wear a white shirt. I went to Wal-Mart Sunday evening to purchase a white shirt since he didn't have one and spent money that was budgeted for something else.

Hoss wore his brand new white shirt to daycare yesterday morning and before the performance, it is ruined. He spilled yogurt all over it during breakfast, thus he had to wear his blue basketball "spare" shirt. Not the white shirt like everyone else in his class. All of that effort for nothing. The hormones did not do well with that.

I was upset that Hoss would once again be different than everyone else, as if he needs to stands out any more, so the tears welled up in my eyes. Then I was mad. Mad at my 5 year old for being clumsy and spilling something. That just led to me being mad at myself for even considering being mad at Hoss....he's just being 5, it really isn't his fault. Plus I was mad that I was so emotional over something so silly like spilled yogurt.

I quickly gathered myself together and settled in for the performance. However, when Hoss spotted me in the crowd, he grinned ear to ear and was obviously thrilled just to see me. Naturally, the tears came again. Good grief!

Then, last night as I was telling my husband about the performance as he was watching the video I took, I began to cry again. Just recalling the emotions I had earlier in the day did me in again.

So, needless to say, the hormones are flairing up. And I'm done with them. DONE!


Jessie said...

Aaww Jess. I remember. I hated it too!
You are a good mommy and you're just going through a psycho phase right now! I am just coming out of it after having Levi. I refer to it as 'when I was crazy!'
This too shall pass :)

Janelle said...

Hang in there sweetie! You're doing fine! Hoss knows you love him and that's all that matters!